I will transcribe just as I did halved (or wholed) in sleep and wake state, the black scrawl (not always grammatically correct, but rather a word picture for time is not linear here) from the dream journal. As often enough, mistakes here are like revelations, think Freudian slips and each crack a place to discover. Sometimes, upon waking and re-reading you'll find yourself wanting to correct, or fix what you think is a sleepy-time confusion, but do TRUST.
While finding a new way requires risk taking, it does not require abandoning or distancing ourselves from the past, which in the fad of positivity and a culture of duality we are all too often encouraged to do. Instead, integrity, or wholeness, includes all of our wounds, our living, our triumphs—our authentic-self does not sit in judgment of the other within, or without our SELVES.
I can’t do it alone is the middle of the night message and also that I am missing the entire point if I think that I can. We’re all connected and ONE and I need help, I am in this experience, this town, and this particular place in the galaxy of realms in order to learn through cooperation and not alienating myself, or putting myself above those around me.
After having a dream of hugging my Dad, not in his old-state-self, the one I grew up fearing and longing for whose mind still worked and yet turned against me, or so I thought, but the old, decrepit man, the one who has suffered a stroke and can’t make simple connections, find things, figure out how to button up his own shirt or untangle a wire.
I first saw it come up as I took a web building class at the community college, my heart swelled with the knowledge that since being a child, I’ve always said if I were any animal it would be a crocodile or an alligator! Not just because my eyes are gold/green, but because I am long and fierce in my love and loyalty! And, just because kids know things like that, without thinking, without having to prove how or why.
Today is a full, super, snow moon and so last night, as I often do, I placed a small dish of water outside to capture some of the moon magic. Usually, I will set this dish of water on my mantel, in front of a mirror and frequently anoint myself throughout the month, usually third-eye with the healing water in a blessing